To pick up where I left off in my last Chicago Blog. They finally opened the gates and we all got through the security checks and started filing in. I had no idea people took it so seriously. There were all kinds of people RUNNING up the ramp to get to the bleachers. Since we didn't really know what we were doing we just continued walking. We got there and had the discussion for a minute of where do you want to sit? I don't care, where do you want to sit? I don't care. Finally I took the lead and sat us down. We were in left center field. 5 rows up from the field on the aisle. Pretty good seats if you ask me. We watched batting practice and such.
When we were sitting there waiting for the game to start Jim Edmonds, I believe, threw a ball up into the crowd. The guy in front of us caught it. His wife was off getting something to drink or something. He was so excited and didn't have anyone to tell so he decided he would take a picture of himself with the ball.
There were a man and woman sitting behind us. The woman was behind me. She obviously knew everything there was to know about everything and the guy knew nothing. She had no problems informing him on every detail of the game. He made the mistake of trying to give Zambrano the nickname Zambrani. She wasn't having it. Everytime he would say it she would correct him and say "NO it's BIG Z" Whatever. First inning starts. Soriano hit a homerun in the first. Everyone jumped up and cheered. In the process the "smart" bitch behind spilled beer all over my back. I understand it was an accident. I don't doubt that at all. The part that really pissed me off was she never said she was sorry. I would have accepted her apology. NOOO. She must have had the longest legs ever because she obviously needed all her leg room and all of my seating area for those mile long legs. She dug her knee into my spine continuously. I just leaned back and rubbed that beer all over her knees. I know that since we were in the bleachers people would bump me. No problem. It was the constant digging into my vertebrae that was annoying me. Then at one point she said "uh oh, everything is spinning. I feel like I'm gonna puke" I don't know if any of you have had someone sitting above you say that but it is not a good feeling. I was worried that I was going to have regergatated beer on my back. Then her and the guy kept saying the phrase "I got your (enter double en tundra)" Example. "I got your 2 balls" Could mean the pitch count or, well, ya know. That would be funny. Well they were saying that about everything. At one point, and I'm not making this up, she said "I've heard Edmonds can be a jerk sometimes". The guy comes back with "I got your sometimes" WHAT? What does that even mean? I was more than annoyed. Oh, then she kept saying "This person sucks balls". The self portrait people left and I had one too many jabs to the back. I finally yelled "I CAN'T HANDLE ANY MORE OF THIS SHIT" and moved down a row. So what does the bitch do? She kicks her feet up on my seat between Zeth and Jenny. I was pist.
Zambrano's first pitch.
Mark DeRosa, Jim Edmonds, Alfonso Soriano
Mark DeRosa
Ok, done with her. Another fun experience. I thought going into the bleachers that there would be a bunch of drunk obnoxious 20-something guys I would have to deal with. Not the case. The drunk obnoxious person happened to be a drunk 60-something woman. She was sitting in the next section over and needed to use the restroom. As she was walking through the row she was grabbing all of the people by the head. I thought she knew them and was messing with them (something i would do). By the look on their faces it was clear she did NOT know them. She got to the aisle and stood there for a minute. You could tell by that glossy eyed not really focused on anything look on her face that she had passed 3 sheets to the wind. She was probably closer to 7 or 8 sheets. She walked up one row and fell backwards and rolled over the girl 2 rows in front of me. Just took her out. The girl had no idea it was coming. So she stood back up and had her hands out to balance her while she said "OK 1...2...3..." like she was regaining composure. Nope. One more step and she took out the kid in front of me with the same stunt. At this point I'm thinking I'm next so I had my hands out to catch her. The usher took control of the situation and was helping her up the stairs. About 7 rows up she fell again and took someone out. She peed (i assume) and made it back without too much incident. It was fun and sad to watch. We were only in about the 3rd or 4th inning.
MY FAVE REED JOHNSON BATTING. Hey cubs fans. Can you find the guy with season tickets who always wears the green shirt and pink hat?
You can't quiet THE-RIOT
Alfonso "waste of $136 mil" Soriano
There was also a couple that got thrown out of the game.I guess the girl had gotten upset with him for some reason because she had gotten out of her seat. Walked past about 10 people in their row and yelled at him from the aisle "I'M GOING HOME RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!!!" The NOW came out with that high pitched I'm getting ready to cry voice. She got really pist when when the guy waved at her. She took off back through the row as 3 ushers took off for her. They don't take lightly to cursing and attacking people I'm guessing. She was on top of this guy ready to knock his lights out. They escorted both of them out. As they were leaving the guy was saying "I'm just trying to enjoy the game" I guess he would be enjoying the rest of the game from the privacy of his own home cause he was OUTTA THERE!
Bored Bull Pen
Jenny was pretty much the coolest person in the bleachers
The game was tied 7-7 in the 9th. We were going into extra innings. 10th inning comes and goes. Still tied. Top of the 11th inning this guy comes out of nowhere to sit in front of us. He was FIRED UP! Jenny and I refer to him as Jerry. Jerry was on fire. He was yelling and trying to start the "LETS GO CUBBIES" chant. He just yelled and yelled.The usher actually told him he needed to quiet down. Then he made the mistake of yelling "WHAT IF THIS WAS THE 7TH GAME OF THE WORLD SERIES? WOULD YOU ALL BE SITTING ON YOUR FUCKIN HANDS" Like I said earlier, the ushers don't take cursing lightly. The usher was ready to kick him out right then but somehow Jerry convinced him to give him another chance. Everyone around him kept saying "but its not the 7th game of the world series" By this time Houston had scored so it was 9-7 Astros. We were defeated. At that point we were all ready for the game to be over so we could leave with our tails between our legs. Not Jerry. He wasn't going to give up. Nooo way! He kept yelling "ALL WE NEED IS A DINK AND A BOMB. A DINK AND A BOMB" I kept antagonizing him. He said something about it being the bottom of the 9th inning. I had to say "Well next time it's the bottom of the 9th we'll talk about it" He just said "Oh come on, you know what I mean" At one point Jenny and I decided to help Jerry cheer. We got up and started yelling just to make fun of him. Everyone thought it was funny. Everyone except for Zeth the fun hater. He got mad and yelled at me. Then he was trying to ump the game. He was all off on his balls and strikes but he was trying. Everyone kept asking him to leave and the usher again told him he needed to quiet down because he was ruining the game for everyone. Then he asked "can I yell Houston sucks? Will I get kicked out if I say Houston sucks?" The usher said he wouldn't get kicked out. Well duh, we were getting swept by Houston. Go ahead and yell that they suck. Anyway, nobody could get Jerry to leave. Finally the 12ish year old boy who got taken out by the drunk woman turned around and said "THERE ARE A LOT OF OTHER SEATS HERE. GO SIT SOMEWHERE ELSE" Talk about leaving with a tail between his legs. Jerry just got up and walked away. We all congradulated the kid on having the balls to tell Jerry what's up.
That is my story and I'm stickin to it.
By the way, the Cubs won tonight.
Posts
1 comment:
Sounds interesting..glad you had a great time!
Post a Comment